Ahoy, I'll be your waiter this evening

Sometimes I wonder what someone from the past would think if brought forward and shown some modern interpretation of their time period. How bizarre would it be to see your desperately difficult life transformed into a theme park? Or how would someone from “decent” society years ago view the current glamorization of what were in their period frightening monsters?

Case in point — the current obsession with pirates, which has ebbed and flowed over the years but is currently in another golden age of marketing, thanks to Disney and Johnny Depp.

This morning at physical therapy, a commercial came on the TV for the new Pirate’s Dinner Adventure, which basically looks to be Medieval Times for the swashbuckling set.

There are two locations, one in Buena Park CA and one in Orlando FL.

Pirate’s Dinner Adventure is acclaimed as “the world’s most unique interactive dinner show.” Guests are entertained with an astonishing display of special effects wizardry, aerial artistry, swashbuckling swordplay, dynamic duels and daring-do; a classic story of good vs. evil that offers the perfect blend of action, adventure, comedy and romance; the opportunity to interact in the adventure; and a sumptuous dining experience.

Of course, the first thing you wonder is who it was who did all that acclaiming about how unique the show is (plus what they were on when they said it), but to me the more interesting question would be what some early 19th century landlubber would think if plunked down in the middle of the first course. Also, isn’t it “derring-do”?

I love how they dance around the whole “Disney” thing:

Just a few gangplanks away from Orange County’s famous Caribbean pirates, a new breed of pirate has set sail in Southern California. Bringing local citizens and visitors a high seas adventure the likes of which hasn’t been seen on the West Coast since Privateer Captain Hippolyte Bouchard set fire to Monterey, raided Santa Barbara and pillaged Mission San Juan Capistrano in 1818.

Good old Hippolyte Bouchard.

Will family diners in the future visit song-and-dance adventures with French Underground guerillas and Nazi stormtroopers, poorly interpreted versions of fast food meals, all with holographic special effects?