And this is why I don't watch the news anymore

It’s not Bread and Circuses, because at least the bread would be vaguely nutritious. Here’s the current headlines on CNN’s front page:

  • Wife who killed preacher husband freed (wife killing husband, murder, death, religion, children)
  • Flossie nears Hawaii; Dean forms in Atlantic (potential mass death and destruction)
  • Barbie, Batman, Polly Pocket recalled (dangerous toys, children in danger, suicide)
  • SI: Hall of Famer Phil Rizzuto dies (sports, death)
  • Baghdad baby rescued from garbage (war, child in danger)
  • 16,000 troops hunt al Qaeda in Iraq (war, terrorism, death and destruction)
  • Imus settles with CBS, ready for work (racism, controversy)
  • Pedophile arrested near day care (children in danger)
  • WJXT: Man ‘mad at God’ drives into church (craziness, religion)
  • Ticker: Gloves off: Mrs. Edwards blasts Obama (political melodrama)
  • Navarrette: Illegal aliens — the new recruits? (illegal immigration, war)
  • WRTV: Indiana woman world’s oldest person (feel-good story)
  • Apologizing rapist freed after 6 months (rape, women in danger)
  • Playground spontaneously burns on tape (children in danger)
  • Say goodbye to ‘John from Cincinnati’ (TV show cancelled)
  • Toilet-paper prank is ‘what class is about’ (obligatory weird news item)